What in your opinion should be the right response?

[kwikphilly]

Interesting OP......uninteresting off topic stuff,not surprised to see it still goes on & on & on. Happy to see the same Peacemakers sharing words of Wisdom still here,the friends I truly miss

   Firstly,the OP states the friend is a Believer....hmmm,so what is there to say?The spirit of pride has a foothold and the "friend" obviously knows better than God.I've been there myself,for the Born Again Believer Gods Word is Written on our heart,His Spirit Abides in us,He Never Leaves us nor forsakes us & still WE CHOOSE to yield to the flesh

   Im wondering if the "Believer friend" asked for any advice,I doubt it......the red flags are highly likely everywhere & yet they'll be ignored......So,what do you say to the person?-as little or as much as Holy Spirit lays on your heart & with the Heart & Mind of Christ-pray the Believers heart is softened,eyes are opened & ears will listen to the Still Small Voice thats been there all along.......just my 2 cents

    Personally,the hardest thing Ive ever had to learn was to keep my mouth zipped when not prompted by God to Speak a Word.....my Holy Roller Bible Thumping days when I was an immature Christian have long since been gone(thank God).....sometimes much more is said by simply being there for your friends,even when they make mistakes... If asked,I'd just ask my friend to seek Gods Will in all things and offer to pray with them if I didnt KNOW what to say

                                    With love-in Christ,Kwik

[Ray12614]

On 10/9/2021 at 5:05 PM, bropro said:

Even though we only dated for less than 3 weeks, I knew her for about 11 years. I could not have been persuaded by even the closest friend to not marry her. As I said previously, we were not committed Christians when we got married. While we were able to maintain a relatively normal marriage at the beginning, as time progressed we became divided over a number of things and the marriage was in jeopardy. In 1974 we came to Christ at the same crusade, and the marriage began to heal and grow because of our new foundation in Christ. I don't see how any committed Christian would entertain going into a marriage with a non believer. Light and darkness cannot successfully thrive.

Gary

 

Agree whole heartedly. It really is as simple as this: Either you obey scripture principals (don't be unequally yoked with unbelievers), or you don't obey.

Everything else surrounding this issue is minor. Marriage is not an evangelistic tool.

[Kelly2363]

1 hour ago, Ray12614 said:

Agree whole heartedly. It really is as simple as this: Either you obey scripture principals (don't be unequally yoked with unbelievers), or you don't obey.

Everything else surrounding this issue is minor. Marriage is not an evangelistic tool.

Everything around anything that gives an opportunity for some believers to parade is the entire ambition for many believers. Its all a parade and the drum major is the most righteous man in the flock. He just loves requiring absolute obedience and then when he goes home to his wife and removes his uniform he becomes a dog. There is nothing minor about that reality - and neither will Christ overlook it. 

[Ray12614]

16 minutes ago, Kelly2363 said:

Everything around anything that gives an opportunity for some believers to parade is the entire ambition for many believers. Its all a parade and the drum major is the most righteous man in the flock. He just loves requiring absolute obedience and then when he goes home to his wife and removes his uniform he becomes a dog. There is nothing minor about that reality - and neither will Christ overlook it. 

So..... help me understand.....  are you saying that it’s okay to knowingly do what scripture clearly says we should not do?  Also please explain the dog comment. 

[Kelly2363]

2 Corinthians 5:1–21

For we know that if the earthly tent which is our house is torn down, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. For indeed in this house we groan, longing to be clothed with our dwelling from heaven, inasmuch as we, having put it on, will not be found naked. For indeed while we are in this tent, we groan, being burdened, because we do not want to be unclothed but to be clothed, so that what is mortal will be swallowed up by life. Now He who prepared us for this very purpose is God, who gave to us the Spirit as a pledge. Therefore, being always of good courage, and knowing that while we are at home in the body we are absent from the Lord— for we walk by faith, not by sight— we are of good courage, I say, and prefer rather to be absent from the body and to be at home with the Lord. Therefore we also have as our ambition, whether at home or absent, to be pleasing to Him. For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad. Therefore, knowing the fear of the Lord, we persuade men, but we are made manifest to God; and I hope that we are made manifest also in your consciences. We are not again commending ourselves to you but are giving you an occasion to be proud of us, so that you will have an answer for those who take pride in appearance and not in heart. For if we are beside ourselves, it is for God; if we are of sound mind, it is for you. For the love of Christ controls us, having concluded this, that one died for all, therefore all died; and He died for all, so that they who live might no longer live for themselves, but for Him who died and rose again on their behalf. Therefore from now on we recognize no one according to the flesh; even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, yet now we know Him in this way no longer. Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. Now all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation, namely, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and He has committed to us the word of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making an appeal through us; we beg you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. 

2 Corinthians 6:1–18

And working together with Him, we also urge you not to receive the grace of God in vain— for He says, “At the acceptable time I listened to you, And on the day of salvation I helped you.” Behold, now is “the acceptable time,” behold, now is “the day of salvation”— giving no cause for offense in anything, so that the ministry will not be discredited, but in everything commending ourselves as servants of God, in much endurance, in afflictions, in hardships, in distresses, in beatings, in imprisonments, in tumults, in labors, in sleeplessness, in hunger, in purity, in knowledge, in patience, in kindness, in the Holy Spirit, in genuine love, in the word of truth, in the power of God; by the weapons of righteousness for the right hand and the left, by glory and dishonor, by evil report and good report; regarded as deceivers and yet true; as unknown yet well-known, as dying yet behold, we live; as punished yet not put to death, as sorrowful yet always rejoicing, as poor yet making many rich, as having nothing yet possessing all things. Our mouth has spoken freely to you, O Corinthians, our heart is opened wide. You are not restrained by us, but you are restrained in your own affections. Now in a like exchange—I speak as to children—open wide to us also. Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? Or what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said, “I will dwell in them and walk among them; And I will be their God, and they shall be My people. “Therefore, come out from their midst and be separate,” says the Lord. “And do not touch what is unclean; And I will welcome you. “And I will be a father to you, And you shall be sons and daughters to Me,” Says the Lord Almighty.

2 Corinthians 7:1–16

Therefore, having these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all defilement of flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God. Make room for us in your hearts; we wronged no one, we corrupted no one, we took advantage of no one. I do not speak to condemn you, for I have said before that you are in our hearts to die together and to live together. Great is my confidence in you; great is my boasting on your behalf. I am filled with comfort; I am overflowing with joy in all our affliction. For even when we came into Macedonia our flesh had no rest, but we were afflicted on every side: conflicts without, fears within. But God, who comforts the depressed, comforted us by the coming of Titus; and not only by his coming, but also by the comfort with which he was comforted in you, as he reported to us your longing, your mourning, your zeal for me; so that I rejoiced even more. For though I caused you sorrow by my letter, I do not regret it; though I did regret it—for I see that that letter caused you sorrow, though only for a while— I now rejoice, not that you were made sorrowful, but that you were made sorrowful to the point of repentance; for you were made sorrowful according to the will of God, so that you might not suffer loss in anything through us. For the sorrow that is according to the will of God produces a repentance without regret, leading to salvation, but the sorrow of the world produces death. For behold what earnestness this very thing, this godly sorrow, has produced in you: what vindication of yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what avenging of wrong! In everything you demonstrated yourselves to be innocent in the matter. So although I wrote to you, it was not for the sake of the offender nor for the sake of the one offended, but that your earnestness on our behalf might be made known to you in the sight of God. For this reason we have been comforted. And besides our comfort, we rejoiced even much more for the joy of Titus, because his spirit has been refreshed by you all. For if in anything I have boasted to him about you, I was not put to shame; but as we spoke all things to you in truth, so also our boasting before Titus proved to be the truth. His affection abounds all the more toward you, as he remembers the obedience of you all, how you received him with fear and trembling. I rejoice that in everything I have confidence in you.

Not a mention of marriage - not a semblance of perverting natural affection - and all to do with sexual immorality that was exposed in the first Corinthian letter that Titus was entrusted by Paul to take to the Corinthian Church. That letter set down the meaning and it was to do with a man who was having sexual relations with his father's wife. Which the Corinthians were boasting in. How sad that we are willing to pervert natural affections in order to uphold an unnatural one. 

[George]

This thread was reported like a dozen times.  I went through and cleaned it up.  Stay on the subject, and let's not make personal attacks or make it personal.

Honestly, in this situation, you can simply share the Word of God!  And allow the Holy Spirit room to operate.  

2Ti 2:24  And the Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, 

2Ti 2:25  correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, 

2Ti 2:26  and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will. 

In any situation where emotions are involved, one must tread carefully, with much prayer otherwise you risk ruining relationships!  

Be blessed,

George

[appy]

True that the word “marriage” doesn't appear in 2 Corinthians 6. neither is there talk of perversion. But one cannot miss the words “yoke” and “unbeliever” in verse 14.

2 Corinthians 6:14 (KJV)
Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

2 Corinthians 6:14  (NLT)
Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness?

Paul for sure in this verse isn't speaking of avoiding unbelievers altogether or not being friends. So what's he talking about? Being unequally yoked must mean something other than being friends, even close friends, with an unbeliever. True that chapter 6 speaking of yoking the Christian faith with other religious or spiritual beliefs. There can be no doubt this principle also applies to other areas in our lives such as marriage.

Wedding day is more than dressing up in wedding apparel and going before a pastor while family and friends are present to witness the ceremony. The ceremony is really about the two coming together to form a lasting and binding contract that is permanent. When the two say their vows, they are agreeing to a contract.

So Paul is talking about making binding partnerships. The next verses tell us why we are commanded to not make BINDING agreements with unbeliever's. Paul cites several Old Testament Scriptures in chapter 6 to show that believers in Jesus must separate themselves from being ''yoked'' to unbelievers since God is their Father and lives among them.

It is important to note that forming a friendship is not the same as forming a contract that is binding. Paul illustrated this point with something his audience understood and was familiar with. And he also drew upon other OT teachings to show why we should not form binding agreements with unbeliever's

A yoke is a solid wooden beam that was affixed to two animals that BINDED them together. Neither animal could go in the direction they wanted to go independently, because they were bound together. Paul uses Deuteronomy 22:10 to illustrate that just as two unequal animals should not be bound together. Neither should a Christian be bound to an unbeliever.

(KJV)
Thou shalt not plow with an ox and an ass together.

(NLT)
“You must not plow with an ox and a donkey harnessed together.

One was clean and the other unclean. But they are also mismatched in strength and size and eventually one or both would chafe the other or both, that is … cause rubbing and sores, as they did not pull equally or in harmony. 

Paul is NOT speaking of romance, but that this is a spiritual issue. Paul is simply saying that we cannot be a Christian on the inside, while enjoying the unbelieving life choices. The two life choices cannot be mixed.

2 Corinthians 6:14
for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

So the idea of being yoked to someone refers to a deep bond that unites two people closely in their life’s direction and labor. For a believer to enter such a deep union with an unbeliever, while it may seem to work for a while, will ultimately chafe both parties as they are pulling in different directions, living by different priorities, serving different kingdoms, and loving different masters. Eventually the believer will be pulled towards compromise, worldliness and a diluted Christian witness.

A Christian shouldn’t pursue or enter into a marriage relationship with an unbeliever. Marriage is one of the most intimate and spiritual of all human relationships, so much so that the Bible tells us it’s a picture of Christ and the church.

Two people might seem compatible in other ways, but if one is a follower of Christ and the other is an unbeliever, it is usually the unbeliever who influences the believer to move away from Christ, and if the unbeliever is not, then the two will be pulling in different directions spiritually. This is most often painful, particularly if children are involved.

Solomon is an excellent example of this, for he started out with a heart for God, but after he married unbelieving wives, they turned his heart from God. 

 

[Kelly2363]

3 hours ago, appy said:

True that the word “marriage” doesn't appear in 2 Corinthians 6. neither is there talk of perversion. But one cannot miss the words “yoke” and “unbeliever” in verse 14.

2 Corinthians 6:14 (KJV)
Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

2 Corinthians 6:14  (NLT)
Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness?

Paul for sure in this verse isn't speaking of avoiding unbelievers altogether or not being friends. So what's he talking about? Being unequally yoked must mean something other than being friends, even close friends, with an unbeliever. True that chapter 6 speaking of yoking the Christian faith with other religious or spiritual beliefs. There can be no doubt this principle also applies to other areas in our lives such as marriage.

Wedding day is more than dressing up in wedding apparel and going before a pastor while family and friends are present to witness the ceremony. The ceremony is really about the two coming together to form a lasting and binding contract that is permanent. When the two say their vows, they are agreeing to a contract.

So Paul is talking about making binding partnerships. The next verses tell us why we are commanded to not make BINDING agreements with unbeliever's. Paul cites several Old Testament Scriptures in chapter 6 to show that believers in Jesus must separate themselves from being ''yoked'' to unbelievers since God is their Father and lives among them.

It is important to note that forming a friendship is not the same as forming a contract that is binding. Paul illustrated this point with something his audience understood and was familiar with. And he also drew upon other OT teachings to show why we should not form binding agreements with unbeliever's

A yoke is a solid wooden beam that was affixed to two animals that BINDED them together. Neither animal could go in the direction they wanted to go independently, because they were bound together. Paul uses Deuteronomy 22:10 to illustrate that just as two unequal animals should not be bound together. Neither should a Christian be bound to an unbeliever.

(KJV)
Thou shalt not plow with an ox and an ass together.

(NLT)
“You must not plow with an ox and a donkey harnessed together.

One was clean and the other unclean. But they are also mismatched in strength and size and eventually one or both would chafe the other or both, that is … cause rubbing and sores, as they did not pull equally or in harmony. 

Paul is NOT speaking of romance, but that this is a spiritual issue. Paul is simply saying that we cannot be a Christian on the inside, while enjoying the unbelieving life choices. The two life choices cannot be mixed.

2 Corinthians 6:14
for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

So the idea of being yoked to someone refers to a deep bond that unites two people closely in their life’s direction and labor. For a believer to enter such a deep union with an unbeliever, while it may seem to work for a while, will ultimately chafe both parties as they are pulling in different directions, living by different priorities, serving different kingdoms, and loving different masters. Eventually the believer will be pulled towards compromise, worldliness and a diluted Christian witness.

A Christian shouldn’t pursue or enter into a marriage relationship with an unbeliever. Marriage is one of the most intimate and spiritual of all human relationships, so much so that the Bible tells us it’s a picture of Christ and the church.

Two people might seem compatible in other ways, but if one is a follower of Christ and the other is an unbeliever, it is usually the unbeliever who influences the believer to move away from Christ, and if the unbeliever is not, then the two will be pulling in different directions spiritually. This is most often painful, particularly if children are involved.

Solomon is an excellent example of this, for he started out with a heart for God, but after he married unbelieving wives, they turned his heart from God. 

 

 

I didn't write a thesis or a speculative report as some do - I posted three chapters of 2 Corinthians and did so to demonstrate rationally and materially that the Apostle Paul wasn't writing about marriage when he wrote the verse that was being used to demand and require a believing man to dump his chosen wife and be a more holy man. I don't care what the passage means but the simple truth is that Paul himself illuminated it in his own words and chapter 7 makes that abundantly clear. Mind you - I don't see many believers stepping down from their self righteous horses any time soon. Thats just the way of it. 

And Jesus quoted King Solomon in a somewhat curious way seeing that he had such a lust for women. It was in connection with the Queen of Sheba seeking wisdom from him. No thesis and no intention of bending my neck to abuse from pious Christians who believe they have wisdom. Then again I have been married to just one woman since the day I asked her father for her hand in marriage. Many of the marriages I witnessed have failed spectacularly. If only they had put less confidence in self righteous nonsense and more confidence in just being decent human beings.

Edited October 15, 2021 by Kelly2363
Last sentence.