I think I committed the unpardonable sin.

[nigh]

Hi everyone.

Several months ago, I realized that I may not be really saved. There were just things that didn’t add up in terms of my experience compared to what the Bible says and what I saw in other Christians. I was also angry with God because I felt restricted by rules I’d been following that I thought were from him that might’ve just been legalism. 

I started praying a lot and reading the Bible, but eventually I got even angrier with God because it seemed like nothing was happening and also these legalistic rules had increased dramatically. I felt like I couldn’t move without sinning. If it helps you understand, I lost a significant amount of weight because I felt I couldn’t eat much due to these rules. 

I had already had intrusive thoughts cursing at God in the past, but I was so angry that I cursed at Him myself in the heat of the moment many times. I felt bad afterward and apologized and asked for forgiveness, but it kept happening. I think because I knew that the Spirit is the one who does the regenerative work that I was upset about not seeing and because I thought these rules were from Him because He convicts us of sin, I even cursed at the Spirit. This wasn’t premeditated, it was very much in the heat of the moment, but I did it many times over the course of time and was very angry with Him in general. I think because I’d read the passage about the unpardonable sin and was afraid of committing it, I even had angry thoughts (that I 100% do NOT believe) at Him that were similar to what the Pharisees said. I quickly apologized for these and asked for forgiveness, but it may be too late for me. I will say I don’t think I would’ve ever thought to think it if I hadn’t read that passage. I don’t know if that matters. 

Anyway, I am feeling utterly hopeless. I have been terrible toward Him, and I don’t know if I can ever be saved. I’d really like to hear people’s thoughts on this. Also, if you think I can be saved, I need to know what to do from here because I prayed and read the Bible and tried to seek earnestly for months, and I feel so far away still. 

Edited January 15, 2019 by nigh

[Wade8888]

Praise God! This is normal.

 

Read Romans 6, 7, and 8 and things will get better.

 

Victory over sin comes from the Cross of Christ: His Death and Resurrection, not self efforts.

 

You seem to know self efforts don't work, so I urge you to study the Cross of Christ instead.

[AnOrangeCat]

If you're worried about it then odds are you haven't committed the unpardonable sin. It's also worth mentioning that even within the church there's some debate over what it precisely entails. A small portion of Christians I've been around actually suffer from anxiety over this very thing!

As someone who suffers from a lot of depression and anxiety issues I can relate. There are a few things to keep in mind.

Consider Saul/Paul. He took an active role in bringing many early Christians to their death. He was forgiven and then used greatly by God.

Second, while there are a lot of commandments in the Bible, Jesus boiled it down to two: Love God with all that you are and love your fellow people as yourself. Everything else really is contained within those two.

 

 

[George]

2 hours ago, nigh said:

Anyway, I am feeling utterly hopeless. I have been terrible toward Him, and I don’t know if I can ever be saved. I’d really like to hear people’s thoughts on this. Also, if you think I can be saved, I need to know what to do from here because I prayed and read the Bible and tried to seek earnestly for months, and I feel so far away still. 

Shalom nigh,

I wish I would have seen this post yesterday.  I'm sorry I didn't reply yesterday.  In my own personal faith walk, I was in a period of 3 months whereby I was convicted of sin deeply ... and I felt as if I couldn't do anything without the weight of sin.  In Pilgrim's Progress, it describes Pilgrim's journey whereby he was constantly carrying this burden ... this is how I believe we are when we are in our incubation state.  As we struggle, we're fighting for faith.  

Honestly, I believe there's a lesson to be learned with Jacob wrestling with the Angel (the pre-incarnate Jesus) in Genesis 32.  Before this particular night, Jacob always offered a sacrifice to the God of Abraham and the God of Issac.  It was always a sacrifice to the God of His Fathers.  It wasn't until this night when Jacob refused to let go -- and said -- I will not let you go until you bless me -- then God changed His name from Jacob to Israel.  Afterwards, you see how Jacob offered sacrifices to the God of Israel.  It wasn't until his own wrestling match with the Lord -- that it became personal for him.  I believe every believe must go through his own "wrestling" match so to speak with the Lord.

In the 1700s , the famous evangelist Jonathan Edwards listed the stages of saving faith.

The first stage is the awareness of the horror of being eternally lost.

The second stage is the attempt to stop sinning to remove guilt.  The person tries to save himself any way he can, and comes to the futile realization that he cannot save himself.

The third stage is the realization that the seeker cannot save himself that only God can save him from his sin.

The fourth stage is the conviction that God is just in His judgment.  God is just in his condemnation of sin and the penalty of his sin.  The seeker comes to the place where he realizes that God does not have to save him and finds himself utterly at the mercy of God.

The fifth stage when the seeker becomes to have an affection for God and the Holy Spirit pours out upon the seeker the gift of salvation and fills his heart with the joy of knowing the seeker is truly saved.  Saving faith will fill a person so deeply that His and life are forever changed.  The new believer is so filled with love, that the believer can't wait to be in the arms of His savior.  And its this love that permeates his being and has a love that passes human understanding, even love that has the ability to love his enemies.

Just so you know, if you're seeking God -- you've not committed the unpardonable sin!

I hope this answers your question fully,

Your brother in the Lord with much agape love,

George

[Billiards Ball]

On 1/15/2019 at 8:54 AM, nigh said:

Hi everyone.

Several months ago, I realized that I may not be really saved. There were just things that didn’t add up in terms of my experience compared to what the Bible says and what I saw in other Christians. I was also angry with God because I felt restricted by rules I’d been following that I thought were from him that might’ve just been legalism. 

I started praying a lot and reading the Bible, but eventually I got even angrier with God because it seemed like nothing was happening and also these legalistic rules had increased dramatically. I felt like I couldn’t move without sinning. If it helps you understand, I lost a significant amount of weight because I felt I couldn’t eat much due to these rules. 

I had already had intrusive thoughts cursing at God in the past, but I was so angry that I cursed at Him myself in the heat of the moment many times. I felt bad afterward and apologized and asked for forgiveness, but it kept happening. I think because I knew that the Spirit is the one who does the regenerative work that I was upset about not seeing and because I thought these rules were from Him because He convicts us of sin, I even cursed at the Spirit. This wasn’t premeditated, it was very much in the heat of the moment, but I did it many times over the course of time and was very angry with Him in general. I think because I’d read the passage about the unpardonable sin and was afraid of committing it, I even had angry thoughts (that I 100% do NOT believe) at Him that were similar to what the Pharisees said. I quickly apologized for these and asked for forgiveness, but it may be too late for me. I will say I don’t think I would’ve ever thought to think it if I hadn’t read that passage. I don’t know if that matters. 

Anyway, I am feeling utterly hopeless. I have been terrible toward Him, and I don’t know if I can ever be saved. I’d really like to hear people’s thoughts on this. Also, if you think I can be saved, I need to know what to do from here because I prayed and read the Bible and tried to seek earnestly for months, and I feel so far away still. 

The unpardonable sin is to reject Jesus as Savior (over and again, until you die). How do I know this? One way I know this is true, Jesus in an unpardonable sin passage says "There is only one thing you can do to miss eternal life."

You need to be mature. To become mature, live in this order:

1. Facts (in the Bible)

2. Faith (trust in God/waiting on God's timing)

3. Feelings

For example, fact--have you asked Jesus to save you? Do you understand His death on the cross and resurrection was for our sin, guilt and shame, and that those who trust Him now will be transformed later, to be able to live perfect moral lives in Heaven?

Fact: You've trusted Jesus for salvation.

Faith/Feelings: "Jesus, please help me to feel saved, I don't feel good today. But I know that per the Bible I am saved, and that faith and feelings sometimes come much later than facts."

Edited January 16, 2019 by Billiards Ball

[frienduff thaylorde]

10 minutes ago, Cletus said:

i think its a safe assumption to say if we still have conflict in our mind between Spirit and flesh, worldly things and Spirit, if we still have conflict in our mind about sin at all... we have hope of salvation. our mind being a battle ground that the enemy wants to discourage and confuse and bring about doubt... God wants us to love Him with everything we have, mind, soul, strength... if we had no hope we would not have such thoughts as we would be given over to depravity. God would give us over to pursue our lusts and evil imaginations. remember... there is no good thing in the flesh... therefore, if you have conviction about sin... then Praise GOD! because He is still working on your behalf. Praise GOD! because He is still drawing you, and you have not been cast off forever. even if you do not feel it... a fire can start from a tiny tiny spark, that smoulders and smoulders, and even in near proximity no heat can be felt. but there is still an aroma in the air. there is still a tiny coal burning. if you have any conviction whatsoever in regards to sin... Praise Him and rejoice and seek His face. make that spark of Holiness catch up by stirring up The Spirit of God in you. Time is running out people... do not harden your hearts!

Brother Cletus has said good truth .  Now lets offer the solution .  REPENT of sin asap , cry to be healed and GOD will hear .   Its not too late ,  but it can be if one remains in that sin

and the heart becomes hardened .    So my advice is ,  REPENT asap , now ,  and cry to the LORD and HE will hear .  For HE gives us all we need IN CHRIST by Grace

to be accepted of HIM and to serve  Him reverently and in godly fear  .  Yes paul knew it , HE said it in the latter chapters of Hebrews ,  chapter twelve .

Grace , THROUGH CHRIST we have all we need to trod that old man under foot .   And JOHN knew that if we pray according to HIS WILL , HE will hear us .

Gods will is not that we sin , but that we go and sin no  more .   And let all others pray for this person too   .  As it is our duty to warn , correct , encourage and pray for the others .

[Guest In Him]

14 minutes ago, Cletus said:

Praise Him and rejoice and seek His face. make that spark of Holiness catch up by stirring up The Spirit of God in you. Time is running out people... do not harden your hearts!

\o/

[frienduff thaylorde]

16 minutes ago, Cletus said:

i think its a safe assumption to say if we still have conflict in our mind between Spirit and flesh, worldly things and Spirit, if we still have conflict in our mind about sin at all... we have hope of salvation. our mind being a battle ground that the enemy wants to discourage and confuse and bring about doubt... God wants us to love Him with everything we have, mind, soul, strength... if we had no hope we would not have such thoughts as we would be given over to depravity. God would give us over to pursue our lusts and evil imaginations. remember... there is no good thing in the flesh... therefore, if you have conviction about sin... then Praise GOD! because He is still working on your behalf. Praise GOD! because He is still drawing you, and you have not been cast off forever. even if you do not feel it... a fire can start from a tiny tiny spark, that smoulders and smoulders, and even in near proximity no heat can be felt. but there is still an aroma in the air. there is still a tiny coal burning. if you have any conviction whatsoever in regards to sin... Praise Him and rejoice and seek His face. make that spark of Holiness catch up by stirring up The Spirit of God in you. Time is running out people... do not harden your hearts!

 Time is running out people... do not harden your hearts

YES IT IS BROTHER CLETUS .  YES IT IS . 

[nigh]

On 1/15/2019 at 11:07 AM, George said:

Shalom nigh,

I wish I would have seen this post yesterday.  I'm sorry I didn't reply yesterday.  In my own personal faith walk, I was in a period of 3 months whereby I was convicted of sin deeply ... and I felt as if I couldn't do anything without the weight of sin.  In Pilgrim's Progress, it describes Pilgrim's journey whereby he was constantly carrying this burden ... this is how I believe we are when we are in our incubation state.  As we struggle, we're fighting for faith.  

Honestly, I believe there's a lesson to be learned with Jacob wrestling with the Angel (the pre-incarnate Jesus) in Genesis 32.  Before this particular night, Jacob always offered a sacrifice to the God of Abraham and the God of Issac.  It was always a sacrifice to the God of His Fathers.  It wasn't until this night when Jacob refused to let go -- and said -- I will not let you go until you bless me -- then God changed His name from Jacob to Israel.  Afterwards, you see how Jacob offered sacrifices to the God of Israel.  It wasn't until his own wrestling match with the Lord -- that it became personal for him.  I believe every believe must go through his own "wrestling" match so to speak with the Lord.

In the 1700s , the famous evangelist Jonathan Edwards listed the stages of saving faith.

The first stage is the awareness of the horror of being eternally lost.

The second stage is the attempt to stop sinning to remove guilt.  The person tries to save himself any way he can, and comes to the futile realization that he cannot save himself.

The third stage is the realization that the seeker cannot save himself that only God can save him from his sin.

The fourth stage is the conviction that God is just in His judgment.  God is just in his condemnation of sin and the penalty of his sin.  The seeker comes to the place where he realizes that God does not have to save him and finds himself utterly at the mercy of God.

The fifth stage when the seeker becomes to have an affection for God and the Holy Spirit pours out upon the seeker the gift of salvation and fills his heart with the joy of knowing the seeker is truly saved.  Saving faith will fill a person so deeply that His and life are forever changed.  The new believer is so filled with love, that the believer can't wait to be in the arms of His savior.  And its this love that permeates his being and has a love that passes human understanding, even love that has the ability to love his enemies.

Just so you know, if you're seeking God -- you've not committed the unpardonable sin!

I hope this answers your question fully,

Your brother in the Lord with much agape love,

George

Thank you for sharing this. I had not read that before.

8 hours ago, Cletus said:

i think its a safe assumption to say if we still have conflict in our mind between Spirit and flesh, worldly things and Spirit, if we still have conflict in our mind about sin at all... we have hope of salvation. our mind being a battle ground that the enemy wants to discourage and confuse and bring about doubt... God wants us to love Him with everything we have, mind, soul, strength... if we had no hope we would not have such thoughts as we would be given over to depravity. God would give us over to pursue our lusts and evil imaginations. remember... there is no good thing in the flesh... therefore, if you have conviction about sin... then Praise GOD! because He is still working on your behalf. Praise GOD! because He is still drawing you, and you have not been cast off forever. even if you do not feel it... a fire can start from a tiny tiny spark, that smoulders and smoulders, and even in near proximity no heat can be felt. but there is still an aroma in the air. there is still a tiny coal burning. if you have any conviction whatsoever in regards to sin... Praise Him and rejoice and seek His face. make that spark of Holiness catch up by stirring up The Spirit of God in you. Time is running out people... do not harden your hearts!

Thank you for your thoughts. I do still have conviction of sin, though it’s faint today. I think I’m pretty worn out physically and emotionally, and that’s affecting things. 

Lately I’ve had to admit to myself that even though I thought I was seeking God, it seems more like God has been seeking me because I keep running when it seems like I’m almost there. I don’t know what to do. Do you have any advice for me? It’s like I think I want God until He gets too close, and then these feelings I barely noticed before come out saying no, keep your distance, the idea of God is scary, I don’t want to/don’t think I can trust someone I can’t see, I don’t want to give up silly worldly things, I don’t want to live for someone else, etc. Also I feel like the gospel just does not sink in. I feel so far away from Jesus and saving faith, further than when I started (though I don’t know if that’s true or just how I feel).

8 hours ago, frienduff thaylorde said:

Brother Cletus has said good truth .  Now lets offer the solution .  REPENT of sin asap , cry to be healed and GOD will hear .   Its not too late ,  but it can be if one remains in that sin

and the heart becomes hardened .    So my advice is ,  REPENT asap , now ,  and cry to the LORD and HE will hear .  For HE gives us all we need IN CHRIST by Grace

to be accepted of HIM and to serve  Him reverently and in godly fear  .  Yes paul knew it , HE said it in the latter chapters of Hebrews ,  chapter twelve .

Grace , THROUGH CHRIST we have all we need to trod that old man under foot .   And JOHN knew that if we pray according to HIS WILL , HE will hear us .

Gods will is not that we sin , but that we go and sin no  more .   And let all others pray for this person too   .  As it is our duty to warn , correct , encourage and pray for the others .

Thank you for the encouragement. I am trying to do as you say. I’d really appreciate it if you remember to pray for me. 

[nigh]

And thank you to everyone who had responded! I would really appreciate prayer if you don’t mind.