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Posted (edited)

So this is a very long story but I am going to make it as short as I possibly can. 

I must also apologize I am new, this is my first post, and I am unaware of the political/religious beliefs/boundaries you all have. I'm also not sure if this was the correct place to post something like this.

In June I was diagnosed with an incurable disease and it has basically devastated every part of my life. I have put my life on pause for now as I am on a spiritual journey. 

My past consists of a very spirit filled family but much tragedy. My family used to consist of a pretty good number of people but because of disease many people died far too early. All of these tragedies happened before I was born but all of the miraculous events also happened before I was born. So the faith I have always had was more like "belief." Which consisted of the basics.

Fast forward 25 years, I myself am a chemical engineer, so when I found out I was sick I intially turned to my mind and exhausted every possible option that mankind has to offer which left me back at square 1. 

I figured I was like the story of the guy who gets lost at sea and prays to God to save him, while a boat and a kayak come up to pull the guy out of the water, he says no no God will save me, he drowns, asks God why he didn't save him and God says, I tried.

So I turned to God in September which was in the midst of what can only be described as the worst depression that you can imagine. I lost 30 pounds in a mater of a couple weeks, wasnt eating, was so anxious I couldnt sleep for days, I would pace like a lion at home, constant racing thoughts and I was so suicidal I thought of myself as too worthless to even kill myself, all I would be is a further burden. 

Fast forward a bit, saw a counselor which helped and started to meet with multiple religious figures and spiritual learders weekly. So I went further into it (faith). My prayer life started to increase and things, coincidences, which I hear don't exist with people of faith, started to happen regularly. 

Thankfully my family has ties to many still living spiritual people, one in particular, prayed for me and in the middle busted out in tongues which I had never experienced or heard before and he was the only person I had a physical manifestation from after his prayer, 5 or 6 surges, kind of like goosbumps, but very quickly all in a row. I had further medical testing done which could not pick up the previously detected disease, however still left room for error.

I took to scripture as I did science, reading and researching, studying all I could. After enough preparation I performed a self-deliverance which rid me of all the voices and constant thoughts in my head. Which I was told sounds like a successful deliverance.

I prayed, almost constantly, almost every waking moment of the day I was praying or studying scripture. "Things" really started to happen (which if anyone cares to know I'll post as a response I have a directive for right now). 

I had joined a bible study group and they had been pushing me to be baptized for weeks and weeks. I was resistant, I was still somewhat suicidal, and when I make a commitment to something as big as baptism I don't quit, and my battle wasnt that I could quit on God, but quit on life. I also wanted it to be genuine, I didn't want to feel like I was using God to get something, which I really was all in all, but I didnt want it to feel thag way. I eventually was baptized in late Oct/early Nov. 

I started to research about the gifts of the holy spirit, a hot topic I soon learned, not something openly talked about. I wanted these gifts, I coveted them. Not because I wanted more from God but because, -

Im not acquainted with any of you but if you have ever had something happen to you that no one can do anything about, where divine intervantion is your only option, and don't say your grandma or even your kid was sick yadda yadda, I know these things are sad, but rhere js something different when it happens to you, something innately different. This caused me to change, my whole perspective on life, you appreciate anything and everything, I havent driven in my car with the music on in 6 months, so I can look outside, feel and smell the air, your desires, aspirations, goals, and dreams all change -

but because I wanted to help people. My family had two miracles happen, both to people who sadly died of other things not too long after, but both were miraculously healed of things with no medical expliantion. I not only wanted to be healed but I wanted to spread the love and the possibilities and the power that is God.

Just before thanksgiving I began speaking in tongues, so for all you doubters, its real, its not fake, and I have even recorded and looked up some phrases that I noticed I kept repeating, and they turned out to be real words in other languages. These languages changed, from Italian all the way to Japanese. Mind you all I speak is a little bit if German, and fluent English and pig latin....ha.

I was practicing this daily, yes you can voluntarily do it, its some not power that takes over your body, I would do it and shortly after I would be exhausted no matter what time it was and I would have vivid dreams if I spoke in tongues before I fell asleep. For me to remember my dreams was highly unusual. Then I started to do it less and almost not at all last week.

Then last Friday I decided to do it right before I went to sleep, I didnt do it for very long, just something quick and I ended up having the most intense dream I have ever had. A dream within a dream, which I have never had before, and it had the D....the devil in it. (A pretty detailed summary of that I also have if you're interested and I would be interested especially if someone on here has the ability to interpret dreams). 

So now what I wrote all of this for, I am looking for a legitimate, credible, person with the gift of healing. Not exactly found in the yellow pages. Don't direct me to any of these televangelists, Binny Hinn, and all his wannabees. These people are frauds, Matthew 10:8 "Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse those who have leprosy, drive out demons. Freely you have received, freely give." Jesus was humble, he didn't broadcast his abilities, his apostles did, the believers did, and he didn't turn anyone away. 

I have found some in my couple months of searching. These are people you won't find on TV or on the news or in a legal investigation. These are humble quiet people in regular houses with no microphones, no radio stations, and lead the average life.

The man who prayed over me believes he has the gift of healing. I found an elderly woman who has documented healings near me. I also found out about a lutheran pastor on the East coast after pulling my own pastor's teeth if he knew someone, apparently he knows another but this guy's job could be injeopardy if it got out. Apparently much of the modern church is against people being relieved of suffering at the hand of those blessed with spreading the work of God.

I live in the Chicago suburbs, so in that general area would be nice, but this isnt just finding a good pizza place, this is to ascertain a miracle, I'll go anywhere.

If you would need to contact me perosnally we can figure that out, not sure how lol, but I don't intend on having anyone's name blasted out who prefers privacy.

Thank you for your time, this platform, and your help. God bless.

Edited by PaulTimothy

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Posted

Welcome to the forum PT, and as you suspected, this is really not the right place for that topic. I suggest you glance around the forums a bit, and you will see places for problems and prayers, Mean time, welcome a few other people who have shown up recently, respond to those who welcome you, and you will quickly get mast our anti-spam  measures, meant if insure that only real people post here. You will find that you can post in most areas of the forums, perhaps withing the next few hours.

Sorry to hear of your issues, and will be praying for you, and hoping that you can find some answers you seek.


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Posted

I saw the problem/prayer section but I felt it wasnt really either of those nor was it just some general chit chat.....if you would like me to post it elsewhere just point the way.


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Posted

Just find an area that seems the most suitable. Sometimes a thread takes on a life of it's own, and if it seems out of character with the topic, we will move it to a more appropriate place, with a link so it does not get misplaced or confusing.


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Posted

Welcome PT, there are some people on Worthy , who may be led to contact you . There will be many who will pray for you.

Please do as omega has suggested , 5 posts ,

God bless you , praying .


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Posted

PaulTimothy, Welcome. If you need Divine healing go directly to the One who has power to heal -- the Great Physician.  But He may or may not heal.  As to desiring spiritual gifts, God gives every believer at least one gift. Discover yours and use it. It may or may not be spectacular, but if spectacular is what you want, you may be moving in the wrong direction.


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Posted

Welcome. Praying for your healing. God bless you.


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Posted

I saw a guy on the Oprah show "John from Brazil" who claimed to have the power to heal people on the spot for free. Of course he accepted donations and there was a convenietly placed gift shop selling t-shirts, coffee mugs, etc on the way out. The Brazilan ACLU did a nice little audit and discovered this poor immagrant farmer who was choosen by God to heal the sick and blind had a cozy 3 million dollar mansion near the beach. Be careful what you wish for. I do believe in miracle healing but than again I was raised Catholic and my family believes The Exorcist was based on a true story so there you go. btw, If I found out I was going to die I would be slightly tempted to undergo MDMA therapy. Yes it is controversal in Christian circles but its starting to gain mainstream recongniton in religous communities. 


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Posted
On ‎12‎/‎19‎/‎2015 at 3:24 AM, PaulTimothy said:

In June I was diagnosed with an incurable disease and it has basically devastated every part of my life. I have put my life on pause for now as I am on a spiritual journey. 

:emot-heartbeat:

Praying~!

~

Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me, the works that I do shall he do also; and greater works than these shall he do; because I go unto my Father. John 14:12

Heal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved: for thou art my praise. Jeremiah 17:14


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